Record of Agarest War – First Impressions

Just don't choke on it.

After picking up the “Record of Agarest War: Really Naughty Limited Edition,” I let it sit on my coffee table for a while.  I wasn’t sure how to approach this box that was at least three times larger than a regular special edition preorder.  I suppose its like trying to ignore the elephant in the room.

Opening “The Box”

With all the art they covered the outside box in, I was hoping for it to be decently sturdy, but it was made out of rather flimsy cardboard.  Inside, all separately wrapped, was the oppai mouse pad, the pillow case (for a standard sized pillow, for those of you hoping for a body pillow), and the game (the soundtrack was included in its own insert inside the game case).

This video will give you a basic idea on how big the box actually is:

Here you can see the promo ad displaying the contents:

The”Booby Pad”

I was expecting some rather cheap pad…but its actually a decent mouse pad.  I don’t see myself using it on a regular basis (or in front of polite company…), but its of good construction and has a sizeable surface to move your mouse on (that isn’t taken up by the D-sized breasts).  For those of you that don’t know, an “oppai pad” (I believe they have an actual name), is a mouse pad that has a woman’s breasts for wrist support.  Fun little things.  Make sucking noises now or forever hold your peace.

The Pillow Case

It’s a pillow case.  A pillow case with an anime girl on it.  I dunno if you’d really want to use this thing for sleeping on, the material seems kinda thin and wouldn’t hold up to regular use or the washing machine that might ruin the art that’s on the fabric.

The Soundtrack

Well, its not annoying.  Its nothing I’d jam out to while driving around in my car or just while lazing around.  But it has 26 decent background tracks on it.  Most of it seems to be synthesized or some kind of hard rock… As a bonus though, the song* they used in the official U.S. debut trailer was added.  Personally, I think that alone is the best song on there.

The Game

I’ve only played about an hour and a half in, and so far its been pretty fun, if not tough.  The AI will happily jump on you if you leave any of your weaker party members open, and it makes good use of all the available game mechanics that you have.  Luckily there are optional gameplay tutorials that pop up as you come upon new terms and features.  I did find myself getting overwhelmed a bit with all the crap you can do in the game. It pretty much just leaves out all this stuff you CAN do but can’t do yet, or shouldn’t do yet, so I think I managed to buy myself into a corner because of the item creation system… rather than say spending it on health and revive items (like the game tried to hint at me to do).  I think my only complaint so far is that the mage… is really, really squishy.  Two attacks and she’s dead.  Luckily, if you buy enough revive items it’s not too much of a problem.

Story-wise, from what I understand, you’re a military leader in an invading army, and you decide to go AWOL when your fellow commander tries to kill this little elf girl.  So you bust his face in, run off with the elf girl, get killed by your army’s uber-knight called “The Black Knight,” and you die.  Then the game ends.

…

… and then some woman comes along and, to put it simply, tells you that she can give you the strength to protect the elf girl if you give her not only your soul, but the souls of all the generations of your family down the line.  Yes, you basically just sold out your entire family to save a little elf girl.  The game puts it in a much lighter and less-evil tone than I am, but it feels a bit off to me.  Either way, I’m having fun with it, I doubt the plot is going to get really complicated, but I’m hoping I get more characters soon so I can see how the whole “date a girl, knock her up, and then go to the next generation” affects gameplay.

More on the game later…

*The name of the song in the debut trailer is “Xxxplosion”, Track 26 on the CD.